Paintball, toffee and braces. Oh my!

I'm admittedly a little bit hazy on the actual definition of "irony" but a few things have happened to me in the past 24 hours that I would (hesitantly) deem to be ironic.

First, my quest to eat all things hard and sticky went awry last night. Thanks for all the great suggestions by the way! We went over to our next door neighbours' place last night for a glass of wine and some munchies on the deck, and they gave me this unbelievably delicious toffee that they had brought back from a recent trip to London. My eating frenzy was clearly an endeavor of reckless abandon and a moment of weakness led me to forget that while I'm not on a liquid diet yet, I still do have braces. Long story short, my moment of toffee-induced euphoria was rudely interrupted by some unknown braces disaster. I was convinced I had pulled the whole band off my molar but a quick emergency visit to my orthodontist today assured me all was still ok for tomorrow. She was, of course, completely dumbfounded that I would eat toffee of all things 2 days before my surgery. I mean, it's not like I'm new to this whole braces situation. Not my most intelligent move. But man was it delicious.

The delicious, delicious culprit

Next ironic (?) thing- my brand new driver's license came in the mail today. Hilarious timing. But I must say, after looking at the picture, I'm more than a little glad that it's only valid for another 14 hours. Eek! She had me point my chin up, so it looks like I'm way too short to even see the camera, and she made me close my lips. Now as some of you may know, when you have an open bite such as mine (and the braces don't help), your lips don't sit closed naturally. It looks completely ridiculous for me to force my lips closed for a photo, almost like I'm blowing a kiss or doing a sulky pouty face. My hair is also slicked back and it looks remarkably like how I picture my mugshot would be if I were to ever have one (I won't I promise). Thank goodness I will be getting all new photo identification when this whole ordeal is over. I just keep looking at it and laughing out loud- ah, comic relief. Hey I've just been hit with a stroke of genius- maybe I'll use my new license as my "before" picture...that way, even if I look exactly the same as I do now it will still look like an improvement. Silver lining! I'm not going to post a picture of it for now to try to hold onto a touch of dignity.

Also, the paintballing yesterday was arguably a success in that I didn't die. No ninja moves were made, though. It was so hot in this place, and the darkness + foggy goggles made it nearly impossible to see your opponents, but I'm fairly certain they all looked something like this:

Our opposition

For comparison sake, I think we (I) looked like this:

Us

I'm 99% sure we were playing against a whole army of Rambo-enthusiasts. This was further proven by seeing them after games assembling and disassembling their own guns, strapping on their seemingly bullet proof vests (tougher than our oversized coveralls) and talking about strategy that wasn't just "hide behind things as long as possible and try to shoot as far as possible". I was instantly reminded as to why I didn't pursue a career in the armed forces. Sorry, Canada (or should I say you're welcome?). I came back with some battle wounds: a few to my outer thigh and knee, knuckles, boob, upper arm, and most notably: mouth. This is where the irony comes in. I was the only one who expressed the desire to avoid all face shots and I got hit square in the upper lip. The paint exploded right into my mouth which was unpleasant to say the least. That round ended for me pretty quickly. By some miracle though, it isn't bruised. It would be embarrassing to explain that I actually injured my mouth twice within 48 hours of having this operation. Ah well- it was fun at least! (Honestly!)

It's hard to believe that in 12 hours I will already be at the hospital. It's been such a hypothetical thing for the past 2 years that it doesn't seem real. My surgery starts at 8am, and I have to be there for 6 (ugh). It will be 10+ hours, hopefully not more than 12, and I've instructed my mom or steph to post a little update when I'm out just so everyone knows how it went. I promise I'll be posting again as soon as possible! Get excited for some grizzly photos. This whole thing is so overwhelming, but I've finally convinced myself that the ability to stick your finger into your mouth when your teeth are clamped shut is not a cool enough party trick to warrant canceling it all. Tonight will consist of cleaning my room, going for coffee with some of my girlfriends, and packing my hospital bag. Fun times ahead!

Thank you so much to all of you for the wonderful, wonderful messages I've been getting. I'm feeling pretty loved right about now!

A 

xoxo